Battered Men
(Domestic Violence Against Men)
Please reach out to me for confidential support. I assure you that I will listen with an open heart and provide a warm, compassionate presence as we navigate your experiences together.
“Even when domestic violence against men turns fatal, as it did with celebrity Phil Hartman, the news coverage usually departs from focusing on domestic violence and centers on mental illness. This shift incites public sympathy for the perpetrator, in this case Hartman's wife.”
I have great respect for all clinicians and agencies dedicated to supporting survivors of domestic violence, regardless of gender. My experience working with countless survivors has been approached with grace and humility. In my practice, I have encountered numerous men in mandated anger management programs who carry a hidden burden—the reality of "The Hidden Crime": violence against men.
During my time at a local nonprofit agency, I taught anger management to many men who openly admitted to their own abusive behaviors toward female partners. Yet, many also revealed that they had endured years of abuse themselves. Some were involved in mutual abuse, while others were solely victims.
Initially, I questioned the frequency of male victimization in domestic violence. Motivated to understand this further, I delved into research and drew upon my clinical training, as well as numerous psychology articles and reputable studies. I discovered that the number of men who are victims and survivors of domestic violence is significant, yet alarmingly underrepresented.
Throughout my experience teaching anger management in a co-ed group, I witnessed profound moments of vulnerability. Often, tears filled the room as a man shared the deep-seated shame he felt after being "beaten up by a woman." The weight of humiliation in those moments was palpable, yet humility and compassion permeated the space. I cherish those clients and am grateful to have been part of their journeys.
To my surprise, the women in the group did not protest these revelations. Instead, many looked down, displaying signs of tension or watery eyes. One individual consistently chose to sit beside the men, offering gentle gestures of support, verbal empathy, or asking permission for a hug. These moments underscored the importance of humility and compassion in the therapeutic process, making the learning experience invaluable for all involved.
Unfortunately, the issue of domestic violence against men remains shrouded in shame—shame perpetuated by societal attitudes and, at times, by the victims themselves. Many view male victims as weak or unmanly, which discourages them from admitting their experiences for fear of judgment. If you are one of these men, please know that you are not alone. I am here to listen with empathy and unconditional regard.
If you are in immediate danger, call 9-1-1.
For anonymous, confidential help, 24/7, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY).
For more information on DV against men read Gluck’s article here: https://www.healthyplace.com/abuse/domestic-violence/domestic-violence-against-men-males-victims-of-domestic-abuse